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A letter from Mike "Mo" Motafches
Dear Pastor Jenkins,
This week has been and continues to be completely surreal. I must admit I am having a difficult time concentrating so please understand if this does not flow smoothly. I hope my grammar is at least in the ballpark. I would love for you to share this with your congregation and please feel free to use the content in anyway you see fit. I know you asked me for some excerpts of conversations I had with Vicky but it appears I practically wrote a book. I hope this answers some of your questions about my journey with Vicky.
Let me first say to all the members of your church, thank you for your prayers for our grieving department. Thank you for your prayers for Tyler, Thomas, and Masen. Your members will play such a key role in helping them cope and recover from this tragedy. Thank you for your prayers for Officer Mike Garbarino.
The first time I met Vicky Armel was about one week before the opening of the new Sully District Station in May, 2003. I went back and forth many times about whether I wanted to transfer to the new station but I eventually decided to go. The rumor I heard about her was that she was a very aggressive and successful detective. It did not take very long for me to see that for myself firsthand. Over the last three years we had worked numerous cases together and I believe we made an excellent team. I often called us the “Dynamic Duo.” As we began to spend time together driving around on our investigations, we began to learn more about each other. She absolutely loved and adored her family and all of her decisions in life were based on what’s best for them. During our many conversations, we also readily discovered some of our major differences. She labeled herself as an agnostic and almost mocked the idea that there could be a God. She said she “strongly believed in science and in the Big Bang Theory. Everything that existed could be explained without a God.” I, on the opposite page, am a member of McLean Bible Church and graduated from Washington Bible College. I believe that God created us and the world we live in. We were truly the odd couple. We would periodically have conversations that turned towards spiritual matters and she would often cut me off and would tell me she didn’t want to hear it. If I had made a list at my station as to who would likely convert to Christianity, Vicky would have been very near the bottom.
One day in early 2004, we went on an investigation together in Maryland. She knew we would be together for several hours and soon after we left the station, she said, “Mo, you’ve got the rest of the day to convince me that God’s exists. I’ll listen to whatever you have to say.” It really reminded me of the man that came to Jesus and asked Him, “What must I do to be saved?” Vicky didn’t have to ask me twice. I told her that the God she does not believe in is the One supplying her very breath to express her disbelief. We discussed the absolute trustworthiness and reliability of the Bible. I told her about the verses in the Bible which spoke specifically about historical events, fulfilled prophecies, end time prophecies, scientific matters, and numerous other issues. I explained that the Bible sometimes disagrees with scientific theories but never scientific laws and facts. When scientific theories become scientific laws, the science books must be up-dated, not the Bible. I explained how the Bible welcomes archeological excavations because when the digging stops, the Bible is proven to be absolutely correct in all its details and the history books have to then be rewritten to correspond to the teachings of Scripture. I asked her, “What kind of Book is this that can predict events before they occur and knows about various facts before they have been discovered?” My suggested answer to her was that God had a message to communicate to His creation.
Our conversation then switched to the existence of God. Although I don’t remember some of the specific points here, I remember telling her to pray to the God she doesn’t know and ask Him to prove Himself to her. I said if He doesn’t exist, all you did was speak to your steering wheel. If He does exist, I have no idea how He will answer your prayer. But I guaranteed He will answer you if you seek Him.
We then proceeded to discuss the central message of the entire Bible. If the Bible was in fact God’s message to mankind, we better make sure we know what He wants to tell us. If the Bible is accurate in all of the ways listed above, then there’s a good chance it’s accurate when it speaks about heaven and how to get there. I then explained how we all have a sinful nature that has created an enormous gap between us and God. I told her that our efforts to bridge that gap always comes up short. I told her that going to church, getting baptized, giving offering, helping old ladies across the street, and all other good deeds are nice but they get us no closer to heaven. I would try to quote specific verses to back up my points. I then explained that even though our good deeds weren’t good enough, God provided a way that was much easier and not based on our own merits. I explained who Jesus Christ was and how He was the central theme of the entire Bible. I explained to her how the birth, life, death, and resurrection of Jesus were foretold in the Old Testament. I explained how one person fulfilled all of those prophecies of which many were not even in His control. I told her that her disbelief in God did not affect His love for her and that He loved her so much that He was willing to pay the penalty for her sin, and my sin, and the sin of the world on the cross. I would often use police related examples and I remember specifically asking her, “Suppose a serial killer goes on trial and is found guilty of his crimes. Then suppose that the judge who found him guilty gives his a $50 fine and no jail time. How would you feel about that?” She said of course she would be outraged. I told her that the payment for the penalty of our sin was so high that only the death of God in the flesh could wipe out the consequences of our sin. I then asked her to imagine the judge, who found the criminal guilty and then sentenced him to death, got off the bench and sat down in the electric chair and died in place of the guilty man. I told Vicky that God paid the penalty for her sin as the blood of Jesus poured out from His body as He was executed on the cross. I concluded by telling her that it is not enough to know and believe everything I had just told her. I told her that she must individually accept God’s payment for her sin by asking Christ to forgive her and come into her life. I tried to explain that she needed to ask Jesus to come into her life and take charge of her life. Put Him in the driver’s seat and see where He takes you. I told her the void in the lives of people can only be filled by God and nothing else can do it.
Vicky made no commitment that day but like the detective she was, she decided to examine what I had said. The very next day, she started listening to the Bible on CD in her office. She immediately checked out books from her local library dealing with the Bible. I explained to her that there are many, many books about the Bible that end up denying its content. The books she chose were not very helpful. She also began immediately listening to Christian radio and she absolutely loved Christian praise songs. Realizing at this point she was seeking God, I brought her some books I had at home. I suggested that she visit a church in her area but to give me a chance to see if I could find one for her in the Warrenton area. I prayed for Vicky and asked God to show me a good church for her to attend. She devoured the books I gave her. I gave her several messages on CD from my pastor at McLean Bible, Lon Solomon. She said she got a lot out of his teachings. Vicky continued to ask me questions based on what she was learning. While I have shared my faith with dozens of people over the last 30+ years, I had never seen anyone so anxious to learn more about God and the Bible. People at my work wanted to know what on earth I had done to Vicky in Maryland and cautioned people to not ride anywhere with me in a car. God did not wait around for me to find a church for her. He let Vicky find it herself when she ran into someone she knew that invited her to his church. I believe she first visited Mountain View Community Church (MVCC) on Easter, 2004. The church gave out a book that day which examined the Bible’s claim of the resurrection of Jesus Christ. That was the exact type of book she was looking for and she was beginning to see God answer her prayers. Although I was familiar with the author of the book and knew it was the perfect book for her to have, I was not familiar with MVCC. I rushed to the computer and looked up the church’s website to see what kind of church she had wandered into. As I read the doctrinal statements of the church, I thanked God for His faithfulness. I could not have picked a better church for her. I am so grateful for how the members of MVCC welcomed her and immediately made her entire family feel like they belonged there. With all of this going on in her life, I asked her if she was now a Christian. She told me she was not but she thought she would be soon. The day I learned she had become a Christian is when she invited me to her baptism in the spring. What a joy it was for me to attend and witness Vicky publicly dedicating her life to God – a God that she once swore did not exist. Vicky’s conversion to God was an act and miracle of God. I am very humble and thankful that God allowed me to play a part in her conversion but make no mistake…all of the credit belongs to the God that has the power to bring life out of death.
Vicky Armel ended up being a type of Christ. Her innocent blood was shed last Monday and she died protecting the officers at the Sully District Police Station. I was one of those officers in the station at the time of this tragedy and I would have probably walked out with her in the parking lot if I had not been addressing an envelope to mail. I left to follow her about 15 seconds later and because of that delay, God spared my life. Like the rest of my brothers and sisters here at the station and throughout our agency, I am in deep grief and sorrow. There is certainly no magical answer that’s helps us understand why God allowed this to happen. I do, however, have faith that God knows much more than me and has much bigger plans than my mind can comprehend. I heard an illustration one time that said our life is like a tapestry. We can only see the bottom side which is sometimes ugly. We see threads going in places we do not understand. Knots are tied and other threads are dangling and sometimes cut. It is sometimes easy to doubt that the tapestry maker knows what he’s doing because it looks like a mess from our viewpoint. The top side of the tapestry looks completely different, makes complete sense, and is often a work of art. We cannot see what God is sewing in each of our lives but let each of us pray, trust Him, and believe that He knows what He is doing.
I will miss my partner, my friend, my hero, and my sister in Jesus Christ. Vicky, you beat me to the other side and I look forward to seeing you in the Kingdom of God. You will be one of the first people I look up when I join you.
May God bless and continue to sustain you all.
Det. Mike “Mo” Motafches
